World Of Warcraft Sucks

JRR Tolkien infamously contemplating the Bilbo/Gandalf blow-job scene.

Lord of The Rings is, without question, the best ever film to date. Before I’d seen the first of the trilogy I was extremely guarded about Tolkien’s work, my many years of D&D giving me fond memories of his part in my fantasy worlds, even though I’d never managed to read more than half the trilogy. Despite this moment in celluloid magic, I feel (and I’m certain millions of other LoTR fans do, too) that Tolkien, and thus the film, failed in one specific area: no nob-in-fanny action.

Even World of Warcraft has inexplicably missed the boat, concentrating on Undead, Trolls, Orcs and Tauren, instead of aiming for the more profitable hard-core market.

An enterprising company has, however, seen the glaring opportunity to combining many a youth’s two favourite past-times, and given us a fantasy hard-core porn episod(om)ic series to download, for a price.

, previously named Whorecraft (how many Vivendi lawyers does it take to change a domain name?), has a reasonably professional website, which gives information about the series and its characters, a story (!), and even downloadable maps of the area in which the story (again, !) takes place.

Apart from cartographers or very poor people, I’m not sure who would want to download the map, as nice as it is. The first six episodes of the first season are available for $8 each, something which cartographers, at least, could afford. Poor people shouldn’t, theoretically, even be able to afford a computer or an Internet connection, but they wouldn’t be missing anything because they would be completely ignorant of Whorecraft. Everyone, except the poor, then, get something out of it, especially the female “actresses”.